I'm having a great day today! I have thought about my little Angel, all day, and smiled! I'm trying to cherish the 22 minutes I did get to spend on this Earth with my baby boy. I have basically been a hermit lately. I've been getting up around 3pm, staying home all day until my best friend gets out of work; and then going to her house and crying with her. I'm sure she's getting tired of it; as is her husband. I have been doing nothing. I haven't gone out, cleaned my apartment, cooked a meal, or even really lived in quite a long time. So today, I woke up around 11:30 (which is good for me), got dressed, went and got myself lunch (which I ate at the Sea Wall, beautiful!), went grocery shopping; and I'm going to cook a chicken/asparagus casserole to have my sister and her boyfriend over for dinner.
I know these things sound common and simple, but for me, it was a great big step in the right direction! I had no fear of being alone. I accomplished daily tasks without having a meltdown. I saw a little boy with his young mother in the market, and was able to speak to them and compliment her on how beautiful her son is, without being in a fit of jealous rage! I know these days only come every once in a while, but I like them. I feel like myself again, at least for now.
On another note, spring is here! I actually took this picture two years ago with a crappy digital camera. It was the day my cousin's daughter (my goddaughter), Helena, was born; and on my way out to visit them in the hospital, I saw this single, beautiful lily in (then my house) my mother's front yard. I took a picture, and it came out amazing! I can't use it for this week's spring/Easter theme at I Heart Faces, because, well, there's no face in it. But I like it, so I wanted to share!
P.S. - I need sponsors for March for Babies!! The walk is in 12 days! If you have even an extra $10 to spare, I would truly appreciate your donation. You can sponsor me online on My Personal Page; or send me cash or check; for which, you can email me at Jacquelyn925@aol.com for the address.
I hope everyone is enjoying spring, wherever you are!
How incredible that you got out and did stuff and felt normal. One day at a time, you will get there before you will find your new normal before you know it!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful pic too!